There are times when I'm really glad certain kids aren't mine. The 9-year-old girl who threw of full on tantrum with foot stomping and loud shrieking in the library because she wasn't allowed to request some book she wanted is one of the those kids. Apparently whenever this kid is told "no" the normal reaction is to throw a hissy-fit until mom and dad give in (which really wonders in their household because that kid totally got what she wanted and didn't even say thank you).
She should be very lucky I'm not her mother. There's no way my kid would have acted like that. This in not me tooting my perfection in motherhood, because B and I have our own issues. My kid wouldn't have acted like that because we would have left the library before she could even raise her voice to screeching level.
One of the few things I've learned as a mom? Giving the kids exactly what they want whenever they want will lead to spoiled and ungrateful kids that will try to walk all over you. Besides, how are they ever going to learn the value of anything if they always get what they want.
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
Friday, March 29, 2013
stop being so judgy
Seriously, some people need to just stop. Just because my family isn't their version of conventional, there's no need for the stink eye, nose upturned kind of attitude.
I get it. The fact that I had my kid young and *gasp* out of wedlock, might sound disturbing. And, wait for it, I choose to be a single unwed mother. Because, as we all know, single mothers are the reason there's sooooo many problems with the world. Yeah, that's it. Because my daughter could never lead a normal productive life both parents weren't in the picture.
Oh. Wait. We both are. We're just not together. Because we realized long before she was born that us together would make us both unhappy people. Which we knew would eventually lead to an unhappy, maladjusted kid. I know, what were we thinking, right? Making a ridiculously adult decision like that.
Why am I bitching about this? The other day, I was basically told in not so many (nice) words that I was in the wrong as a parent because a) I had my kid too young, b) I was going to hell because I had sex before marriage and c) I was screwing up my kid's life because we never got married and she has 2 different households. "It just isn't a healthy environment for her".
I took a calming breath (because I was pretty close to punching her out) before pointing out that a) yes, I was young, but 20 isn't that young. I also had a very well-paid full-time job and insurance that I didn't have to worry about, b) yes, I did, but it's the 21st century and not many people are celibate these days. Sex before marriage isn't some new trend I started all on my own. Yes, I happened to get pregnant, but sometimes shit happens. Having my kid, whatever the situation isn't something I'll ever regret and there's no way she could ever make me feel ashamed. C) Yup, B has two different households. And she likes it that way. She has a bunch of people who love her more than anything and that will drop everything to be by her side. Having people care - yeah, that's real unhealthy for any kid. She's one of the most well-adjusted kids I've ever met and I'm comparing her to kids that have both parents married and living together (and I am not saying kids that come from that kind of household are messed up, because I'm not, so no one get their feathers all ruffled. I just mean B's just as well-adjusted) . One thing I can say two households has really helped her with is that she's rolls with the punches and change so easily. Sudden change in an environment isn't something she even blinks it. My kid is loved and that's a hell of a lot more important than whether or not her mother and father have a little piece of paper. Our family situation isn't perfect and doesn't work for everyone. We all work our butts off to make it work for everyone in our family and for B. And it works for us.
I very kindly thanked her for very unrealistic and very misguided opinion and walked away.
So what's the point of this long and vent-filled post? It's dedicated to the woman (who's name I don't remember, but I'm pretty sure I never want to know) who's apparently stuck in the 19th century with her skewed views, who feels the need to point out if you're not living your life like hers, you're in the wrong. Your opinion doesn't mean jack squat to me. Lady, I'm allowed to live my life as I choose with no regrets and no need to justify it to you. Just like you're entitled to be an ignorant dumb-ass.
But I'm not judging you.
I get it. The fact that I had my kid young and *gasp* out of wedlock, might sound disturbing. And, wait for it, I choose to be a single unwed mother. Because, as we all know, single mothers are the reason there's sooooo many problems with the world. Yeah, that's it. Because my daughter could never lead a normal productive life both parents weren't in the picture.
Oh. Wait. We both are. We're just not together. Because we realized long before she was born that us together would make us both unhappy people. Which we knew would eventually lead to an unhappy, maladjusted kid. I know, what were we thinking, right? Making a ridiculously adult decision like that.
Why am I bitching about this? The other day, I was basically told in not so many (nice) words that I was in the wrong as a parent because a) I had my kid too young, b) I was going to hell because I had sex before marriage and c) I was screwing up my kid's life because we never got married and she has 2 different households. "It just isn't a healthy environment for her".
I took a calming breath (because I was pretty close to punching her out) before pointing out that a) yes, I was young, but 20 isn't that young. I also had a very well-paid full-time job and insurance that I didn't have to worry about, b) yes, I did, but it's the 21st century and not many people are celibate these days. Sex before marriage isn't some new trend I started all on my own. Yes, I happened to get pregnant, but sometimes shit happens. Having my kid, whatever the situation isn't something I'll ever regret and there's no way she could ever make me feel ashamed. C) Yup, B has two different households. And she likes it that way. She has a bunch of people who love her more than anything and that will drop everything to be by her side. Having people care - yeah, that's real unhealthy for any kid. She's one of the most well-adjusted kids I've ever met and I'm comparing her to kids that have both parents married and living together (and I am not saying kids that come from that kind of household are messed up, because I'm not, so no one get their feathers all ruffled. I just mean B's just as well-adjusted) . One thing I can say two households has really helped her with is that she's rolls with the punches and change so easily. Sudden change in an environment isn't something she even blinks it. My kid is loved and that's a hell of a lot more important than whether or not her mother and father have a little piece of paper. Our family situation isn't perfect and doesn't work for everyone. We all work our butts off to make it work for everyone in our family and for B. And it works for us.
I very kindly thanked her for very unrealistic and very misguided opinion and walked away.
So what's the point of this long and vent-filled post? It's dedicated to the woman (who's name I don't remember, but I'm pretty sure I never want to know) who's apparently stuck in the 19th century with her skewed views, who feels the need to point out if you're not living your life like hers, you're in the wrong. Your opinion doesn't mean jack squat to me. Lady, I'm allowed to live my life as I choose with no regrets and no need to justify it to you. Just like you're entitled to be an ignorant dumb-ass.
But I'm not judging you.
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Constantine

Keanu Reeves. 'Nuff said.
Well, not all Keanu Reeves. I love this movie for a number of reasons. One is Keanu Reeves. He pulls off the brooding, I'm-going-to-hell-and-I-don't-give-a-sh*t title character well. Not because I think he's that type of guy, but because he seriously pulls it off well. Or maybe it's the lazy suit and tie deal that makes him look like he rolled out of bed and threw it on as an after thought.
Or possibly the whole heaven-and-hell-fighting-over-the-end-of-the-world. Because like Supernatural, that's the theme of the movie. Which always fascinates me to no end. Because people are interesting and slightly desperate creatures when faced with their own demise. Yeah, I know, I've got issues.
But seriously, I read the comics and I'm a bit of a fan, so it makes sense that'd I see the movie. And it didn't suck or completely ruin my faith in turning comics into movies like some. *ahem*, yup, looking at you FOX and all you're horribly crappy movies. Not naming any names or anything. X-Men: United, Wolverine, X-Men: First Class. I'm still trying to purge their version of Gambit. And Mystique. And the entire First Class that they totally messed up beyond repair. And everything they completely ruined about the X-Men that I loved. That destroyed my faith in comic movies until I saw Iron Man.
But I digress. Because Constantine was awesome in it's non-X-Men related-ness. And that is why it's on my favorite movie list.
Friday, March 22, 2013
my spring break
Spring break started. My whole week off of school to spend recovering from a very long quarter began today. I fully intend to keep busy.
Besides catching up on my shows (Boardwalk Empire, The Walking Dead, Supernatural, Deadwood, Big Love, Suits, Ghost Adventures, Sons of Anarchy, Mad Men, etc), working on the outline for my next book, catching up on blog posts and other internet related things, I also need to make a dent in my to be read pile. Because it's huge. I'm talking shelves upon shelves because I had a habit of buying books, but never enough time to read them. So I'm starting with these:
Besides catching up on my shows (Boardwalk Empire, The Walking Dead, Supernatural, Deadwood, Big Love, Suits, Ghost Adventures, Sons of Anarchy, Mad Men, etc), working on the outline for my next book, catching up on blog posts and other internet related things, I also need to make a dent in my to be read pile. Because it's huge. I'm talking shelves upon shelves because I had a habit of buying books, but never enough time to read them. So I'm starting with these:
This doesn't include the eBooks on the iPad I'm going to tackle. I think this will be an interesting spring break.
Peace and hugs.
Saturday, March 9, 2013
boardwalk empire
I seem to have a thing for HBO shows. Well, maybe I shouldn't say "thing" because it's not like I'm having a relationship with HBO shows.
I just happen to find almost every HBO show fascinating and can't get enough of them.
I've been putting off watching Boardwalk Empire because the shows I normally watch on HBO are either fantasy types (Game of Thrones) or good ole fashioned vampires that don't sparkle in the sunlight (True Blood). I've put it off because it's based (very, very loosely) on an actual person. And features other persons that were very real once upon a time.
When I was younger in my long ago teen age days, I was really into history. I still am, but like most things I enjoy, I don't have (spend) enough time with it. From the age of thirteen til about fifteen, I was really into post-WWI America, the '20's & '30's. Mostly, I wanted to learn everything I could about the organized crimes of the day. I would spend hours at the library checking out books about Lucky Luciano, Meyer Lansky, Al Capone (because I am a Chicago at heart), the list goes on and on.
My mom never thought it was weird, but she liked history as much as I did, so why would she really?
I'm usually more than a little reluctant about watching something based on real people that I know and have read about. It goes along the lines of why I have to read the book before I watch the movie. Chances are the creator's are going to go a crappy way with their artistic license. Oh, yeah, I'm looking at you, Hunger Games. And Public Enemies (I won't even go into how they royally screwed that one up).
And even though I'd heard great things about the show, I was in no hurry to watch. Even Lucky Luciano being a prominent character wasn't enough to sway me. I stayed my stubborn self and refused to give in until it was on for a few seasons. If I liked it, I like being able to watch the seasons in back to back if I want to because I have no patience and HBO waits an effing year between seasons. I forget what happens when a show has more than 3 months between seasons.
But I digress. I had a copy of the first season of the show. I recently got rid of cable because, well, it's tiresome and distracting, so I have all these shows on DVD (thank you very much huge hard drives and the library). The show kept staring at me, whispering sweet nothings to me, convincing me I wanted to watch. Evil DVD's.
Until finally I couldn't take it anymore and I watched. I watched the entire first season in a day. And I wanted to watch the second season immediately after.
I'm halfway through the second season and I already have the third season cued up to watch. Because it's just that damn good.
Seriously. The character development and plot makes you feel invested in what happens to them. Like if a certain someone named, um, J betrays their surrogate dad named, let's see, N, you care. Well, I do, anyway. And they're not even my favorite characters. I normally favor the secondary characters (i.e, Eric & Terry on True Blood and The Hound & Osha on Game of Thrones), and this show isn't any different: I'm totally invested in Richard Harrow & Angela Darmondy. They're both damaged goods, but you keep hoping they'll find the other side of the rainbow one day.
And the best part? They didn't completely screw up timelines and history. Just a few inconsistencies but nothing I'd freak out about and can't handle. Even the butt-kicking mobsters are on par.
Now that I've raved about it, my break is over and I'm going to continue watching while I eat some pizza.
Laters!
Thursday, February 21, 2013
so very in love
with this little beauty. She's gorgeous, isn't she?
Whenever I go into any store that has electronics, I won't let myself stop and say hello to the cameras because, well, I'll drool and wish I had a crap load of extra money underneath my mattress to buy one. Or at least be able to sell a kidney on the black market for the cash.
I made the mistake of picking her up and I didn't want to put her down. We connected on a spiritual level. Well, not really, but I didn't want to part.
And as much as I love the camera I already have (and I'm hoping that as I write this, she won't decide to suddenly crap out on me, because I do appreciate her and all technological goodness), I kind of want a new one. By "kind of", of course I mean desperately and yesterday instead of someday soon.
Whenever I go into any store that has electronics, I won't let myself stop and say hello to the cameras because, well, I'll drool and wish I had a crap load of extra money underneath my mattress to buy one. Or at least be able to sell a kidney on the black market for the cash.
I made the mistake of picking her up and I didn't want to put her down. We connected on a spiritual level. Well, not really, but I didn't want to part.
And as much as I love the camera I already have (and I'm hoping that as I write this, she won't decide to suddenly crap out on me, because I do appreciate her and all technological goodness), I kind of want a new one. By "kind of", of course I mean desperately and yesterday instead of someday soon.
Saturday, February 16, 2013
sherlock vs. elementary
Both of these shows are a modern day take of the adventures Sherlock Holmes and John Watson. One is set in London and the other is in New York.
They're two very completely different shows in so many different ways. (Individuality is always a good thing)
Sherlock is basically a modern retelling of Sir Conan Arthur Doyle's original stories. John was injured in Afghanistan and he still keeps a journal, only now it's an online blog. Which everyone reads and that's why they all know who Sherlock is. The season's are only 3 episodes long, so it's more of a mini-series. But they end them on cliff hangers that tick me off (in the best kind of way, of course). I'm still waiting to see where they're going after the way season two ended.
Now, Elementary. I'm still not really how I feel about this show. Sherlock is a recovering drug addict and Jane Watson is the companion his father hired to keep him in check and in line. I don't know if the creators made John a girl because they want some kind of romance between Sherlock and Jane because it would be too much to have to guys hook up (because wouldn't that just offend everyone? *insert rolling of eyes here*. Personally, I'd much rather see a relationship between the two on Sherlock than on Elementary). Which I'm really hoping they are not going there. Shows don't always have to have a romance between the main characters.
I started watching Sherlock first, so I'm a little bias about loving it so much more than Elementary. Elementary is very American (not that that's a bad thing). Sherlock has more issues than the X-Men and so does Jane. Again, not a bad thing. The creators want you to be emotionally invested. I get that. But I don't feel personally invested. The show overall has some interesting cases and Sherlock is pretty obnoxious, but that's how I like him. I'm not attached to this version of Sherlock - if I miss an episode, I'm not too upset.
Sherlock is a pretty cut and dry British TV drama. I think that's why I like more than Elementary. I have plenty of show where there are 30 billion different kinds of drama (The Walking Dead, Suits, Supernatural, etc.), but there are times I want a break from all that extra drama. Sherlock is drama but without all the extra drama that American shows always have to have. I don't think shows always have to have it to be interesting to watch. That's probably why I don't watch reality shows anymore.
So, I still haven't made up my mind on whether or not I like Elementary. I guess this is more of a post on why I like Sherlock more? Well, that seems to be the story of my life.
So, I still haven't made up my mind on whether or not I like Elementary. I guess this is more of a post on why I like Sherlock more? Well, that seems to be the story of my life.
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